“Here you go,” the waitress said. “One extra large pizza. Half meat lovers, half veggie delight. Is there anything else I can get for you boys?”

“Nope,” Max said.

“We’re good.” Alby lied. It wasn’t exactly a lie, mind you; more of a knee jerk reaction. When a stranger asked how you were doing, you were supposed to say ‘fine’ or something. It wasn’t like the waitress could get what he really needed. It wasn’t like she could get Alby a new father or something.

“Okay,” the waitress smiled. “Wave me down if you need anything. I’ll come check on you in a bit.”

Alby’s arm started to reach out at the woman’s retreating figure, but he stopped himself. He didn’t want her to leave. Now that the meal was delivered, Alby was one step closer to breaking up with Max and that was another step closer than he would have liked.

Tony’s Pizza wasn’t the best pizza place in town but it was perfect for breaking it off with Max. The food was good if not great, it was usually busy but rarely crowded, and they didn’t deliver. Alby didn’t know if he’d have the strength to do it any other way. Doing it over the phone was too impersonal and there’d be no way to do it at the office without things blowing up and their whirlwind romance and the messy aftermath would be the fodder for the latest round of office gossip. It was going to be that anyway, Alby assumed, but there was such a thing as harm reduction.

A public setting was best for this sort of thing. Max would be less likely to raise his voice or say anything that would hurt Alby too badly because he wouldn’t want to make a scene. A panopticon of strangers kept everyone professional; which is all they’d be after tonight.

Alby swallowed down the lump in this throat and reached for the triangular pizza spatula or whatever it was called to get himself a slice.

“Here, let me…” Max tried to say, but Alby’s paw clasped onto the wooden handle before the wolf could finish the thought and sliding a slice that was positively dripping in meat onto his plate in no time. “Ah. He grunted. Nevermind. You got it.”

“Yeah,” Alby agreed. “I got it.”

He took a bite, chewed, and swallowed without really tasting anything.

He’d get the bill, too. It would be completely in cash so that Max couldn’t just pay for the whole thing on his card. Or if Max decided to be a stubborn asshole about it, he could leave the wad of cash in his back pocket as a tip.

Growing up, Dad would often say things like ‘If you’re going to throw someone out on their ass, the least you can do is give them a full stomach first’. Alby used to think it was a sign that his father was a kind person at heart. Now that Alby was sitting in the proverbial hot seat, he believed that it was more an excision of guilt and an expression of control.

If you’re going to throw someone out on their ass, you’ll feel less guilty about it if you basically pay for them to go away and food isn’t something that is kept forever so it’s not like you’re giving them a real gift. Dad wasn’t much for sentimentality. Dad probably forgot the ex-employee’s name by the time he was taking a dump that night.

Dump. Poor choice of words.

Speaking of being thrown out on one’s ass and hot seats, Alby’s seat felt very uncomfortable. No diapers. No training pants. Not even a pair of panties. Alby felt naked as a result. Every few seconds, he’d shift in his seat, expecting to feel padding that wasn’t there.

“You okay there?” Ba-...Max asked.

Alby blinked and stared down at his plate. He’d gulped down the first slice and had accidentally been staring at his empty plate. “Huh? Yeah.”

“Here,” Max said. “Have-”

“I’ve got it.” Alby served himself another slice of meat glued to bread with sauce and cheese.

It was good to be here to break things off. If they’d been at his apartment or Max’s farmhouse, the wolf might have talked him out of it. It would have hurt too much to push him out the door and Alby didn’t have the mental fortitude to leave Max’s house.

His little dog’s eye twitched when he realized that he’d never be able to go to Max’s place ever again. No Christmas parties or any other kind of celebration involving Max. Not because his father had put that barrier in place but because just thinking about returning to that blessed place as anything other than Max’s baby girl hurt too damn much.

He’d probably have to avoid Max altogether at the office until the oncoming pain finally subsided. So…anywhere from two years to the rest of forever.

No. This was much better. Any minute now, Alby would rip the bandaid off, leave the money on the table, and walk out of Max’s life forever; even if it felt like Alby was ripping his own skin off.

He’d have to act quickly, though, or else he’d lose his nerve and doom both of them. That’s why as soon as Max suggested they go out to this place, he knew he had to follow through. Because if he didn’t, his father would.
***************************************************************************
Max chewed slowly on his vegetable pizza. The texture and the crispiness of the vegetables made a satisfying crunch every time he chewed. It was probably the only thing satisfying about this whole ordeal. With every bite, Max heard the crunching inside his mouth and pretended the sound was him getting ready to scream.

He felt like a dying man trying to wrap up his bucket list whilst a gun was pointed at his head. There was so much he’d wanted to do, even now. He wanted to ask the waitress for crayons and a coloring mat so Alby would have something to pin to the refrigerator. He wanted to take her slices of pizza and cut them up into little bites. He wanted to insist that Alby eat a slice of veggie before taking another slice of meat. At this very moment, there was a dab of tomato sauce clinging to Alby’s bottom lip and it was taking everything Max had not to reach for a wet nap to dab it off of Alby and brush the crumbs off of the little doberman’s shirt.

So much left to do but no time left to do it.

When Alby had been wiggling in his seat- Max had wanted to ask if the pup needed a change or needed to go potty. He couldn’t tell what kind of underwear Alby was wearing, but that was likely for the best. Thinking about Alby’s underwear and how absorbent it may or may not be put him in exactly the wrong kind of mindset.

Goddamnit!

The nursery was already put away and locked. All of Alby’s toys were crated and boxed. He’d put all the dollies, toys, and clothing that he specifically associated with her in a separate cardboard box and sealed it shut in the attic. Maybe he’d offer it to Julie the next time they chatted. Kitty was about Alby’s size and there was no reason someone shouldn’t take joy from such simple pleasures.

Max had chosen this venue to do the deed and cut things off because he knew he didn’t have the strength to do it anywhere else. It wasn’t as nice as the places that Mr. Madden took his employees to be sacked, but Alby would have suspected something if he had.

If Max wanted this to work, he’d have to convince Alby that this was his idea and that he wasn’t being threatened or coerce. He’d have to shoo the poor dumb puppy away and make Alby mad enough to stay away. Given the options, he’d rather have Alby hate him forever than to be heartbroken.

He hated that he was doing this. Hated that this is how the old man likely wanted it to go down. A single meal and a dash of civility didn’t cancel out the cruelty of the act itself; nor the pain and hardship that were likely to follow. Even so, it was the best that the big wolf could manage on such short notice.

“Alby…” he said. “I want to talk to you about something.”

Alby shoved the next slice into his mouth up to the crust and bit the whole thing off. He was binging; not with alcohol but with greasy food. That kind of self-harm was definitely one of Alby’s stress responses. Did he already sense something was about to happen? “Yeah.” Alby said after he swallowed. “Me too.”

*****************************************************************************************

One…two…three…

“I think we should stop seeing one another,” Alby said. It had been surprisingly easy to say. It hurt, but the worst of it was over.

Or so Alby thought.

“Yeah,” Max replied. “I think that would be a good idea, too.”

What?! Just like that?! No questions?! No objections?! No lamentations?! Did Alby really mean so little to Max?

“It’s nothing you did…” Alby tried.

Like a conversational judo master, Max did the most damage by going along with Alby’s suggestion. “Yeah.” Max said. “I know. Just sometimes it’s not a good fit.”

Did…did Max think that Alby wasn’t a good fit for him? Had he gotten tired of Alby and was ready to toss him away like a balled up diaper? Had Max, in fact, brought Alby here to break up with him? “What do you mean?”

Max’s response was decidedly non-committal. “Being a Daddy is hard work. It takes a lot out of you. I hadn’t had someone like you in a while. Trying it with you reminded me why.”

Alby wanted to bawl. He’d been that much of a drain? That much of a burden that Max was ready to quit being a caregiver all together?

No.

That didn’t make sense. Max had tons of active ‘Daddy’ and “Daddy Dom’ profiles across a bevy of kink sights. Alby had noted them all during his ill fated doxing attempt. Max still wanted to be a Daddy; he just didn’t want to be Alby’s.

“Yeah,” Alby pretended to agree. “I get it. It’s not something you seemed very happy with.” He took a bite of pizza. “Or good at it.”
******************************************************************************************
“Yeah,” Alby agreed. “I get it. It’s not something you seemed very happy with.” How could Alby even think that? Max’s soon to be ex wasn’t done, though. He took another bite of pizza and swallowed. “Or good at it.”

Max had had his pride hurt before and had experienced his fair share of heartbreak, but he’d never had both happen at once. Had he actually hurt Alby? He wanted to dig deeper, to ask Alby what he meant by that; to do something to ease the hurt that Alby was clearly feeling.

That wasn’t the part he was supposed to play tonight. That wasn’t the deal he was supposed to close. And Max? Max was a deal closer.

“Yeah,” he said. “Not everybody is as good at being little as Kitty.”

The crust still in Alby’s grasp fell into his lap. “Excuse me?”

“I’m just saying,” Max shrugged. “It’s not for everybody. I wasn’t a very good Daddy for you, and you weren’t very good at being a baby.” Max felt like he was hammering himself in the gut. “No offense.”

“None. Taken.” Oh that was lie. That was definitely a lie.

Good.

Maybe after this was said in done, Alby could find someone else to take care of them and love them in ways that Max just wasn’t being allowed to.

“I just had to explain so much to you.” Max dug his own grave deeper. “Again and again and again and on and on.” He shook his head. “Jesus, dude. It’s not that hard. If I’d actually wanted to raise someone from the ground up and deal with their every little problem and neurotic insecurity, I’d have gotten a real baby.”

**************************************************************************************************
“I just had to explain so much to you.” Max twisted the knife. “Again and again and again and on and on.” He shook his head. “Jesus, dude. It’s not that hard. If I’d actually wanted to raise someone from the ground up and deal with their every little problem and neurotic insecurity, I’d have gotten a real baby.”

They were sitting directly from across from each other, and Max was chomping on a veggie pizza, but where his soul was concerned Alby felt like the big wolf had just lunged across the countertop and ripped his throat out.

“Yeah, well maybe I wouldn’t have to learn so much if I didn’t have such a shitty teacher,” Alby quietly snapped back. “You thought I was a normal guy and your solution to me trespassing was to put me in a maid costume? Get some therapy, man.”

The wolf’s ears flattened on his head. “Nobody at work thinks you’re a normal guy, Alby. Everybody thinks you’re a weirdo who can’t take care of yourself and is living off Daddy’s dime and reputation. My mistake was thinking that made you pup material.”

With every word, it was becoming much easier to break it off with the big jerk. Yay?

Alby took out his wallet, removed a couple of bills and left them on the table. “Maybe that’s why I called you ‘Daddy’,” he sneered and stood up. “Because you two sound a whole hell of a lot alike.” He got up and rushed out before he could start crying.

The skies had opened up outside in the parking lot. This was good. Raindrops were indistinguishable from tears. He’d failed at not crying, and he’d bawl all the way home. Probably sob himself to sleep tonight in his now much more grown-up bed. Max hadn’t seen him start crying though, and even if he followed him out into the parking lot (which he surely wouldn’t) he wouldn’t be able to tell as long as the shuddering shoulder shakes and snot bubbles were kept at bay.

A rogue thought: Why did his Daddy sound so much like his father tonight? Alby had been the one trying to emulate Albert Madden Sr. tonight, but that last line from Max sounded like it was coming from the old man himself.

Max had asked him here. But Alby had been the one pressured to break up with him.

Unless…

What if Alby hadn’t been the only one to get an ultimatum?

“ALBY!” Max’s voice thundered out. “WAIT!”

Alby slowed, but he didn’t stop. His body was on autopilot and his stubborn streak was pointing him in the direction of finishing this gruesome task. Now if only he could fish his keys out of his pocket and drive off.

Max chased Alby out into the rain. The downpour intensified and a soaked Max was by Alby’s side in seconds. “Baby!” He pleaded. “I’m sorry! Wait!”

“Baby?” Alby dumbly repeated. “What do you-?”

Alby’s words were cut off by the big wolf kissing him on the lips. Alby sunk into Max’s embrace while lightning and thunder threatened above them.

Max broke off the kiss. “I’m sorry.” He said. “I was lying. I didn’t mean any of it.”

Alby wrapped his arms around his Daddy. “Me neither, Daddy. I’m sorry. I didn’t know what else to say.”

“I need to tell you something,” Max said over the sudden downpour. “It’s about your dad.”

“I’ve got something I need to talk to you about, too!”

And they would.

Later.

At Max’s farmhouse.

With Alby wearing something frilly on top and something crinkly on her bottom.

Right then though? They settled for kissing and calling each other by their true names.

“I love you, Daddy.”

“I love you too, baby girl.”
********************************************************************************************************
“And that’s kind of where things stand…” Alby said, finishing his side of the story.

They came right home to Max’s house and told one another everything they knew without hesitation. Both were still damp from the rain. Alby needed Max’s lap just to calm down. Talking about drinking and trying to purge his room had sent him backwards to the point of almost reliving the recent events.

Alby even talked about how she had wet herself and cried in the fetal position hugging her stuffed animal, by the time she and Max were done talking both felt like a huge weight had been taken off their shoulders. Secrets were always heavier than anger and humiliation.

Sufficiently lightened and feeling more like himself, Alby slid off of Max’s lap and started pacing about, trying to think of some genius but unlikely way out of this.

“What do we do?” It was the thousandth time Alby had asked that question. Alby kept asking it the way gambling addicts played slot machines. One of these times, he’d get a payout, or so he told himself. At this point it was less of a question and more of a verbal tick. “What are we going to do?”

“We’re going to have to move,” Max sighed. “I don’t see any other reasonable option.”

Alby tugged at his ears like he was trying to rip them off his skull. “Well what about unreasonable options?!”

Max threw his head back into the recliner’s headrest and wished it was concrete. “Baby-”

“I’M NOT A BABY RIGHT NOW!” Alby cut Max off, blinking back tears. The beat of silence and a concerned look from Max gave him snapped Alby out of it. “Sorry. Go ahead.”

Max gave his boyfriend a shallow, sad smile. “Your father is the biggest textbook and test publisher in five states. He’s a hair’s breadth from busting into the national market.”

“So?” Alby yipped. “I’m an office manager and you’re a salesman. My Dad’s company isn’t the only one that needs those.”

“You think rich people don’t talk to each other?” Max asked, rhetorically.

“They do, but it’s not like everybody knows everybody else.” Alby’s Dad was rich but not famously so. The producers of Shark Tank weren’t calling anytime soon and he wasn’t taking thirty minute trips into outer space.

“They do around here,” Max grumbled. “Which is why we’ll have to move if we want anything beyond a dead end entry level position. Might have to start at the bottom anyway.”

“Why?” Alby yelped and started to whimper.

“You’ve worked for him all your life,” Max reminded him. “I’ve worked for him for about seven years.” He corrected himself. No…eight. Do you really think we can rely on him as a reference?”

Alby bowed his head. “Not really.”

They were in the situation they were in because Alby’s old man (Alby was beyond the point of thinking of Albert Sr. as his dad) was a control freak and was gleefully determined to pit their personal lives against their own careers.

“What if I quit?” Alby asked.

“He’d still fire me.” Max said with an uncomfortable degree of certainty. “He’d know why you quit. What if I quit?” He already knew the answer, but some things had to be said out loud just so one could say they’d been considered.

Alby shook his head. “We’d still have to keep everything secret. He’ll fire me and cut me off as soon as he knows that we’re still seeing each other.” It wasn’t any real conflict of interest from a business sense; Albert, Sr. just didn’t want their romance to happen at all. “If we’re going to keep this secret going, you should be making money.”

Max grit his teeth. He hated keeping secrets. Not that he broadcasted his relationships and various kinks to strangers, but there was a pretty thick line between being professional and minding one’s business versus hiding in the closet and burying a part of yourself so deep that sunlight never had a prayer of reaching it. Him and Alby wasn’t something he liked keeping secrets about. “Like I said, that’s why we’ll have to move.”

Alby stomped his foot in frustration and bit into his knuckle. He growled at himself. Far too babyish. Far too little. He couldn’t let his guard down. Not when the old man was involved. “I hate that. I hate that so much! It feels like running away!”

Max’s shoulders slumped. “It’s not really running away. It’s just…finding a new territory.”

“Do you really want to sell your house and move? I thought you grew up in this place or something.”

“I don’t want to sell this place,” Max agreed, “but I’d rather do that than…” as much as he tried he couldn’t put the words ‘lose you’ out into the air. Saying it out loud made it too real. He adjusted his seat and tugged at his damp shirt clinging to wet fur. They weren’t dripping anymore but neither had changed. “Do you want me to change you? Might make you feel better.” Max didn’t say it, but it would also make him feel a smidgen more in control of everything. Asshole boss and hostile work environment be damned, the least he could do is make his baby girl feel more comfortable and loved.

It would make Alby feel better. It would! It really would! But feeling good had been what had caused this. Taking risks and letting their guard down is what had gotten them in this position in the first place. Being vulnerable had fucked everything up. And right now, being in that nursery and having a diaper slid under his hips would make Alby feel more vulnerable than anything else.

The little dog’s own intrusive thoughts won out. “Maybe he’s right!” He let his hands drop to his sides. “Do we really want to have to jump through hoops and toss away our whole lives just so that I can wear diapers and you can change them?”

Max rose up slowly from the recliner. He reached out with both hands and gently gripped Alby’s shoulders. “I’d love you even if I never got to put you in a diaper ever again.”

Alby leaned into Max’s chest. The wolf’s arms immediately wrapped them all away around the dog’s body. “I’d love you even if I never got to wear again, either.”

“I don’t want that to happen, though.”

“Me neither.” Alby choked.

The hug melted away about a minute later. Max pulled back, but only so that he could take Alby’s hand. “C’mon. Let’s get you cleaned up.”

Alby dug his heels in, instinctively. “We shouldn’t.”

“We should.” Max gave another gentle tug at Alby’s arm. “Come on.”

“I don’t want to,” Alby lied.

Max patted the top of Alby’s head and ran his hands straight back down to the back of his neck. “It’s not for you, little girl, it’s for me.” He chuckled and looked down on the floor. “That and the furniture,” he joked. “We both tracked in enough puddles when we got home. I don’t want you making anymore.”

Little girl. Home. Making puddles on the floor. Every word was massaging knots out of Alby’s tired brain that she didn’t know were there.

Max didn’t let up. “Can you do that for me? Can you be a good girl and come upstairs with me and lay down so that Daddy can get your diaper on for you? Can you do that for Daddy?”

Good girl. Her diaper. For her. And she’d be helping. Doing it for Daddy. Not for herself. That wasn’t selfish. That was loving. “Yes, Daddy.”

Alby looked down at each and every step on the way to the nursery. Wanting to smile but feeling guilty for it. Daddy unbuckled the belt and Alby tried to help by unbuttoning her shirt. Daddy just lightly slapped her hand away. “Shh. Let me do it. You just relax, princess.” He took brief note of Alby’s boxers. “A little girl like you shouldn’t be wearing big boy pants like this.”

She obeyed and stayed perfectly still for him while he took off the damp and wrinkly big person clothes. She started to pant lightly when he took a light fluffy towel and rubbed her down until she was as dry as possible. She moaned in relief as he put her on the changing table and finished the job with a light dusting of unscented cornstarch rubbed all over her so that whatever minute droplets the towel missed got soaked up.

When he crossed her ankles and hoisted her knees all the way back to her stomach she closed her eyes and breathed deeply while Daddy slipped the fresh crinkly padding beneath her. She shuddered in ecstasy when he sprinkled extra baby powder onto her and then taped the diaper up. He barely nudged her but she rolled over onto her side so that he could properly fasten the cuff for her tail.

“Good girl.” Daddy’s praise was met with a wagging crinkle. He rolled her back over and helped her sit up. “Stay.” he said. Alby did. Daddy trotted over to the chest of drawers and took out a deep lavender dress with white trim and a Peter Pan collar. “Don’t want my baby girl getting a chill.”

Like a good girl, Alby raised her arms over her head so that Daddy had an easier time getting the dress on her. The tiny hem was purely for show and nothing save for remaining perfectly still and standing would keep those with eyes from seeing her diaper, cartoon decorations and all. Good. In a perfect world, she could be a girl and a baby all she wanted and nobody would think otherwise because why would a normal person give two thoughts regarding a baby’s diaper if they didn’t have to change it.

This felt normal. This felt right. She slid off the changing table and leaned into Daddy’s chest. He wrapped his arms around her and for a while the pair just swayed there. They looked like two kids at a middle-school-prom; not dancing as much as gently rocking back and forth to music only the two of them could hear. Or perhaps a better simile would compare them to a little girl dancing on top of Daddy’s feet. Either way, it was the closeness and the intimacy of the moment that was important.

“I wish we didn’t have to hide,” Alby whispered loud enough for Max to hear.

Her Daddy rubbed her back. “Me too, darlin’. Me too.”

“Why can’t we?” Alby asked before he could say ‘but-’.

“You know why,” Daddy sighed in reply.

They wandered over to the crib. Neither one was tired but it was the comfiest spot in the room. Daddy lowered the railing and hopped in, letting his legs dangle over the edge. Alby climbed up and laid her head in his lap so he could gently stroke it while they fantasized.

“Still…wouldn’t it be nice?”

Daddy had already forgotten. “What would?”

“Being like this all the time? Me like this. Being a baby. You being my Daddy. You taking care of me. Me playing with you.”

Max didn’t stop petting her. “Yeah, pumpkin. That would be nice. I wish we could. Diapers are expensive, though.”

Alby felt guilty just then. She’d just relaxed enough and had an ‘accident’ right as Max was reminding her. Oh well. It couldn’t be helped and Daddy wouldn’t want her using the potty right this second. “Yeah,” she said. “I just meant it would be nice if this felt less like a costume.” That had been an accidental lie. In actuality, she felt like what she’d been wearing minutes before was the costume. A mask that she put on when she needed to be taken seriously to get her way. The Hyde to her Jekyll.

Max understood enough. “Yeah,” he said. “This is one of those things that would feel better if it wasn’t any kind of special occasion.”

“Yeah. I wish this could be an everyday thing and not an every once in a while thing or a thing we didn’t have to hide.” The hiding part was about to go into overdrive. First thing in the morning more than likely. They’d work that out later.

“I’d still wear adult clothes when we went out,” Alby continued wistfully. “And I’d still want to have sex, of course…”

Max smirked. “Of course.”

“But wouldn’t it be nice if as soon as I got home, I’d get to go back to being little and you’d get to go back to being my Daddy?”

“Would I have to learn more about your video games and cartoons?”

“Anime.” Alby corrected him.

“Would I have to learn more about your video games and anime?”

“Probably.”

“Worth it,” Max chuckled to himself. “Still worth it.”

It was an idyllic little fantasy. One that Max supposed was still possible. Just that in both their fantasies, “home” was here, at the farmhouse. Not somewhere a million miles away where the pair were complete unknowns in every business, social, and kink circle, starting over from the bottom up.

Max’s mind turned to pragmatism over fantasy. “Diapers can be expensive though.” So were parties. So were conventions. The drawback of living a double life was the need to pay for two of them. “We’d need to find a way to do it while making money.” That was the choice they were making by living here. They could either be themselves or they could be employed but probably not both at the same time.

Alby rolled over to her back and hiked up the front of her dress. She’d never really appreciated the cartoon decorations plastered all over her bottom. “Where do you get these?” Alby asked. There was a zero chance that these would be found in either a pharmacy for old people or in the baby aisle at any given grocery store.

“Online,” Max answered without much thought. “Specialty stores. Niche companies. That sort of thing. Some of them are owned by bigger medical companies that branched out into the market. Others are kinksters like us who found the money to make their own.”

“And they’re only online?” Alby wondered.

“Yeah,” Max nodded to himself. “They tend to be very discreet. Boring brown boxes only and company records that don’t sound remotely babyish or kinky.”

“So everyone hides…”

“Kina…” Max grunted.

“That’s a shame,” Alby said, trying to enjoy the moment.

“Yeah. But it is what it is.”

“You’d have been a very good diaper salesman.”

Max stopped petting Alby. He looked down into her eyes. “Come again?”

“You know how there used to be door to door salesmen? Vacuum cleaners? Makeup? You’d be really good at convincing people to buy diapers.”

The big wolf let out a low, dry chuckle. “You’re very sweet to think so, baby girl. But I don’t think I could convince many people to wear diapers.”

“You convinced me,” Alby reminded him. She sat up so that she was more on his level. “Anyway I don’t mean that you’d turn boring people into people like us. I just meant that if people were looking for diapers, you could probably convince them what to buy.”

Max wasn’t taking the compliment. “Neither of us has that kind of money. We can’t invent a new diaper.”

“You think my father created the curriculum from scratch?” Alby almost laughed. “It’s mostly the same stuff that everybody else is doing every year, just packaged up differently.” She scooted herself closer to Max. “Can’t you work for one of the big diaper companies- the big big ones- and sell for them?”

“They don’t really need me.” Max said. “Everybody already has their favorite.”

Alby gave Max a loving smooch on the cheek. “So? I bet those school boards you pitch to already like whatever textbooks they already have in stock but you still make the sale.”

Max did something close to blushing. “Yeah. I guess I do.” The gears in his head started turning round and round. “I mean…there are independent dealers and middlemen…and I wouldn’t be able to undersell the parent company…but I could make up the difference if we delivered within a certain radius and saved on shipping.” He licked his chops. “Or found a way so that customers came to us…”

Static crinkling filled the air with Alby’s tail gently wagging. “And keeping track of supplies, calling distributors, placing orders, and scheduling meetings isn’t something that has to be done from an office building.”

A gentle rustling of sheets joined the crinkle with Max’s tail beginning to join Alby’s in concert. “No they don’t. A little girl could do all of that from home I guess, as long as she remembered to talk in a big person voice.”

Alby couldn’t help but giggle. “Yes Daddy.”

Max started to pat the sides of his pants. “I…I need to go make a call…” he said when he re-confirmed the emptiness of his pockets.

His little dog grinned. “Yeah?”

“Yeah…” Max rushed down the stairs, his paws clicking against the hardwood floors the entire way and his heart beating too loudly for him to hear it. He rushed down into the kitchen and dug his cell phone out of the box of rice he’d plunked it in just to be on the safe side.

“Hello, Julie? It’s Max. Do you got a second? I just had a crazy idea and I need somebody to either stop me or help me out!”

Not that Max would ever admit it to her, but he was silently hoping his old bunny friend would prefer one particular option over the other. Lucky for him, Julie was twice as crazy as he was.

********************************************************************************************************
(One Month Later…)

Albert Madden, Sr. preferred to keep drama out of his life. Drama was just useless window dressing on a conveyor belt of inevitability for those too weak minded to accept their fate. The dramatic was for salesmen, magicians, and the rubes who bought into whatever the other was selling.

But babies always needed their fuckin’ bottles and women always wanted that one last kiss. Few were as intelligent, reasoned and enlightened as he and for some reason believed that an employer had more of a duty to his workers than his workers did to him. The reason for Madden’s success was simply that he wasn’t above putting kindness in his quid-pro-quo tool belt and made sure to pay people in bread and circuses along with their cold hard cash.

Still, he dearly hoped that when the time came for the doctor to tell him he was about to take the big sleep, that the quack would just cut to the chase and tell him how long he had left. Doctors were paid for medical information, options, and results, not soliloquies about how everyone did their best. It wasn’t on Albert to make them feel more comfortable for their inadequacies.

That day he picked up his phone. “Why aren’t today’s meetings in the system?”

“Alby’s not here.” His secretary informed him. “Said he wouldn’t be coming in.”

He’d been doing that a lot lately. Junior almost never called in sick. The boy could hold his liquor and knew better to use a hangover as an excuse. A dark cloud formed above the old dog’s head. “Is Max in yet?”

“Max said he wasn’t coming in today, either.”

“Either?”

PING!

PING!

PING!

Three emails crashed into his inbox. Two were identical letters of resignation, differentiated only by the signature at the bottom and one brief but very personal letter:

Albert,

I would have resigned and verbally torn you a new asshole in person but after much thought I’ve concluded that you’re just not worth the time and energy to do so. Despite being my father, you’ve never really wanted to be a part of my story anyways. I see no reason why you should be more than a footnote in it going forth.

Luke warm regards,
Alby

P.S. Sorry I didn’t tell you this after a delicious meal or some other extravagance to showcase my power over you. You’ll get over it.

Albert Senior grit his teeth and growled at the monitor. His face felt hot and his blood boiled. He wanted to pick it up and chuck it out the nearest open window.

He’d been betrayed! Rejected! Him! He’d made a plan and now it wasn’t being followed! But his plans were law! They couldn’t just be ignored! Nobody quit on him! He fired them! The damn sissy was worse than his mother!

Still…like so many narcissists before him, Albert Madden Sr. figured out a way to make it a success.

“About damn time he stood up for himself,” he muttered to himself.

It was the closest he’d felt to pride in someone else. A novel, almost amusing feeling, if he was being honest. Like a faint tickle from an errant breeze.

“Gloria,” he called out. “Contact H.R. and begin the firing process for those two. Full severance packages included!”

That would do it. He’d give them enough money so that their lazy asses would get good and comfortable, and when the money ran out- and it would- they’d come crawling back to him. Then he’d have the last laugh.

In the meantime, he’d be able to replace Alby and save on expenses by not having to pay for a bachelor pad. He could probably afford to pay whatever scab he found.

Max? That cur was never coming back. Getting rid of him was a bonus, too. If the best salesman in the company wasn’t safe, then that would light a real fire under everyone else’s ass to boost sales and seal deals. Just so long as none of the water cooler crowd got wind that they’d tried to quit, everything would be just fine in the long run.

At least that’s what Albert Madden Sr. told himself to get to sleep that night.

***************************************************************************************************
(Eighteen Months Later…)

“I can’t believe it,” Alby said. Her voice was a whisper, yet it echoed off of empty walls and empty shelves. They wouldn’t be empty for long. “It’s happening! It’s really happening!”

She spun around on the balls of her feet, practically chasing her tail in her euphoria.

If anyone were to look at Alby Madden II, they would never have guessed the little dog would have ever been a stiff office worker with a starched up collar and a stick up his ass. Ever since getting out from the old man’s thumb, everything she wore was some shade of pink or purple if it wasn’t girly dresses that showed off her diapers.

Gender-fluid was a good look for Alby.

“Yup!” Kitty agreed. She skipped around in her own wide circle; a child on the playground’s blacktop. “Diaper Town is really happening.”

“I thought we were calling it Diaper Mart!” Alby said. “Remember? We’re going to set it up to look like the baby section at Walmart. Just…you know…with bigger stuff.”

“Eventually,” Miss Julie agreed. “We’ll need to make some more capital before we start trying to re-sell highchairs and carseats.”

“As long as we can get all the diapers out of my place,” Max said.

The two little girls clutched one another the way their cartoons did whenever someone saw a ghost. “Are we getting p-p-potty trained?!”

Jullie rolled her eyes and brushed her bangs off her forehead. “He means all the extra diapers and you two know it.” Kitty wore diapers and training pants almost every day, and it had been at least a year since Alby had used a potty.

The pair grinned back evilly. “Maaaaybe!” Kitty said.

“Yeah,” Alby yipped. “You don’t know what we don’t know! We’re babies!”

Max came up beside Julie and put one hand on her shoulder. “This is a bad idea…” He gave her a nervous squeeze with one hand and patted his pocket with the other.

“Yeah, but they’re friends now, so they have to keep being a bad influence on each other.” That wasn’t what Max had been talking about, and Julie knew it, but she chose not to steal his thunder.

“Too late now, Daddy! We’re hitting the big time!”

Max untensed and stepped forward. “More like the middle time,” he joked. “But I’m happy, too.”

For well over a year they’d busted their asses. Budgeting, meetings, sales pitches. Negotiating sales contracts and setting up meetings. It was all the hustle and bustle of big business without the safety nets and amenities. Just as many late and sleepless nights as slinging textbooks, only the focus was on giant versions of things meant for people too young to talk.

It had almost taken the fun out of it.

Almost…

Some days they operated with drug dealer-like paranoia, selling out of the trunks of their cars at munches and doing quick handoffs to people afraid to be seen. Other times they set up shop and vended at local events and plugged themselves at parties. The quartet had started a munch in a nearby town just to make sure the customer base for a brick and mortar diaper store existed.

Luckily it did.

Honestly, it was a very amusing story now that the big hurdles were finally cleared.

“Yeah,” Kitty started prancing around again. “We’re not really in the big leagues until we make and sell our own diapers! No! Clothing! No! Furniture!” She gasped. “No! All of the above! Everything!”

“One thing at a time, dear.” Julie said. “Let’s just focus on getting this place up and running.” She eyeballed Max. “Let’s get a hang of the basics before we go even crazier than usual.”

Max took the hint. “Yeah,” he swallowed. “One thing at a time.” He patted his pocket again.

Julie took her little kitten’s mittened paw. “Someone needs a diaper change,” she teased. “Come on, Kitty. Why don’t we go to the restroom and you can tell me what the changing table should look like.”

Kitty blushed, finally noticing just how much her diaper was sagging. “Yes, Mommy!”

“Good girl.”

Alby watched them go, her tail lightly wagging. “I’m glad they’re our friends. Thank you for introducing me to them, Daddy.”

“Alby?” Max said, sounding strange. “I have something I need to tell you. Something I need to…to ask you.”

“Yeah?” Alby turned her head. “Hh?” Max wasn’t where he was supposed to be. He was down on one knee, his head bowed down low while he was digging around in his pocket. The little dog’s eyes widened. “You’re a switch?!”

She’d meant it as a joke. Max didn’t laugh. “Do you…?” He fumbled again.

“Oh my gosh! You are!” Despite himself Alby’s headspace started to crack and he drove himself to a near panic almost instantly. Had Max gotten bored of Alby? Did he have needs that he’d hidden? That he was ashamed of? Would Alby have to learn how to flog him? Or change his diapers? Would there be a secret sign added to their play to indicate who would be the adult and who would be the baby? “Okay! That’s okay! We can do that!”

Max didn’t tell her to hush or that she was on the wrong track or call her a little idiot. He just kept digging around in his pants for something and taking deep breaths.

“Alby…” Max said. “You’ve been my co-worker, my boyfriend, my baby girl, and my business partner.” From out of his pocket came a small black box. “Do you wanna…” the big wolf choked on his words, unable to complete the sentence. “Would you…?” Alby had never seen him this nervous before. “I mean…um…?” He popped open the box and revealed the engagement ring. “Do you wanna?”

The little dog barreled into her Daddy wolf and rode him all the way to the ground, kissing him with machine gun speed and sniper rifle accuracy. “Yes, Daddy! Yes! A million times, yes! Forever and always! Forever and always! Yes!”

“I love you, baby girl.”

“I love you, too, Daddy!”

(Happily Ever After)